You sir are the best.
http://www.gusjohnsongetsbuckets.com/
Friday, March 18, 2011
Top Ten Ugliest Dook Players of All-Time
Bracket Central takes at look back through the ages to find out just who is the ugliest dook player of all-time.
Honorable Mention, J.J. Redick, 2002-2006
#1 on the Top Ten Douchebag list, J.J.'s severe case of back acne lands him here. Always lurking under those t-shirts he was forced to wear, the backne was almost as horrific as his poetry.
10. Shane Battier, 1997-2001
No so much ugly as weird-looking, those strange creases running across his skull are disgusting.
Who's my Daddy? Not this ugly fucker.
#1 on the Top Ten Douchebag list, J.J.'s severe case of back acne lands him here. Always lurking under those t-shirts he was forced to wear, the backne was almost as horrific as his poetry.
No so much ugly as weird-looking, those strange creases running across his skull are disgusting.
Who's my Daddy? Not this ugly fucker.
9A. Miles Plumlee, 2009-
No shit, his father's name is Perky. Miles backed out of going to Stanford to join his younger brother who had already committed to dook. Which brings us to...
9B. Mason Plumlee, 2010-
His jersey says it all. Cut off from the picture, it reads "I'm ugly!"
8. Mike Dunleavy Jr, 1999-2002
Sr. isn't quite as bad a coach as Jr. is ugly, but it gives him something to shoot for.
7. Ryan Kelly, 2010-
No fear gentle readers, dook will have years of ugliness to come as Ryan is only a freshman.
6. Cherokee Parks, 1991-1995
What a dumpy, creepy guy. No wonder dook's recruiting fell off during his tenure.
5. Nick Horvath, 2000-2004
Nick now plays professionally in New Zealand, which is convenient for his role of Gollum in the upcoming movie "The Hobbit".
4. Kyle Singler, 2007-2011
A painfully ugly dude. And why is his hair always soaking wet? Coach K had to go all the way to Oregon to find this ugly duckling. Will he grow into a beautiful swan?
3. Jon Scheyer, 2006-2010
Not even Jon's mother's tremendous rack could keep him off this list. His facial contortions are the stuff of legend.
2. Bobby Hurley, 1989-1993
Everyone's favorite Bobby Hurley moment is when he ran off the court with the runs multiple times during the 1990 Final Four. But he was damn ugly too, ugliest ever for a lon time, until...
1. Shelden Williams, 2002-2006
Fetal Alcohol Syndrome is no laughing matter, but Shelden Williams is hands down the ugliest player to wear the Blue Devil blue. From the early allegations of gang rape, to his awesome pornstache to his amazing likeness to Simpsons Ken Griffey Jr, there is nothing pretty here. The Landlord reigns supreme.
The Endorsements
Bracket Central endorses the following:
1) Friday afternoon basketball
2) The Weather. Hats off to Mother Nature.
3) Subway's $5 Footlong of the Month: The Meatball and Pepperoni. Very nice.
4) Endorsements.
5) The Reverend Al Green.
6) The recent Anti-Earthquake Movement.
7) Patrick's engagement. Congrats!
1) Friday afternoon basketball
2) The Weather. Hats off to Mother Nature.
3) Subway's $5 Footlong of the Month: The Meatball and Pepperoni. Very nice.
4) Endorsements.
5) The Reverend Al Green.
6) The recent Anti-Earthquake Movement.
7) Patrick's engagement. Congrats!
Day 2 Begins
An incredible afternoon gave way to an equally atrocious evening yesterday.
It's all about Carolina and dook today though, Bracket Central will be pulling hard for the Pirates of Hampton againast the Butt Pirates of dook.
It's all about Carolina and dook today though, Bracket Central will be pulling hard for the Pirates of Hampton againast the Butt Pirates of dook.
Thursday, March 17, 2011
Looking Ahead
Hopefully Michigan State will show up to the aircraft carrier game with this awful team.
Early Bracket Analysis
Keene Terry has already lost a semi-finalist. Vanderbilt might have been the worst pick ever. Please god let that man have already mailed a check.
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